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I have not yet posted an episode recap...why? I've been running around since Wednesday night like this:


AUUUUUUUUUUUGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHGHEKKOOOOOEUUGGHGHGHGH!

Category: Episode Recaps -- posted at: 3:49 PM
Comments[25]

Ohmycostanzas do I love me some Sawyer.

Seriously, how stick-a-pin-in-my-jolty-heart good was he this week?

And how BAD are the Others as liars?

OK, well, I should rephrase. I was just as horrified as you all (that's right, own it, you were shouting and throwing your Mac 'n' Cheese at the TV set, you know it) when Benry shook that bunny to seeming death. All I could say the entire rest of the episode was, "He killed the bunny. He killed the bunny. He killed. The bunny." I mean, forget torture and human experiments, kidnapping, infiltration, bribes, coercion, beating of Sawyer, tricking of Sawyer, cutting into Sawyer's beautiful chestâ?¦ the thing that made him utterly, irrevocably evil for ALL TIME was the killing of the bunny. You know it.

And still, they DID paint an 8 on the bunny, which is almost as cruel. So, if you have bunnies with 8, 15, 16, 23, 42 (I know I'm missing one) on them, one of each number on each, and put them all in the crazy teacups ride at Coney Island, will their magic jigger explode the universe?

Alas, Desmond was not with the nekkid. He *was* with the crazy lightning-rod-building, saving-claire's-lifeness of everything.

Here's a brain-cooker, brain-fryer, brain-wok, whatever: Why when the LOSTies look out from their Island do they not see the OTHER Island? Don't give me the "but they're not directly facing that Island" theory - if they're not, then Sayid and Jin and Sun just traveled half the dang thing and no sign of other land, soâ?¦ what's going on? We saw the plane crash, right above them - with all their hiking, SOMEONE would have been able to see a glimpse of land from SOME shore, SOMEWHERE, whether they were a Tailie, a Fusie (??), someone on the doomed sailboat mission, the loony French Rambette, SOMEONE would know that there is another Island there.

So what do they use? Mirrors? Is this all very Truman show?

And here's another cooker: Someone (we aren't told who but are nudged to believe it's Benry, and given his little soliloquy at the end of this episode I would agree) has rapidly advancing cancer. Yet Rose's cancer is gone. What's the dealie, yo? Why does Rose get the voo doo and Benry (or whomever) does not?

Other points:

-Has Kate NOT CAUGHT ON yet that they're LISTENING to her and watching her? God, woman! Then again, Benry was pretty much only looking at Sawyer. What's the deal. Does she know anything about what's happening?

-Sawyer gave lots of money to his child. We thought he was a "bad" guy coming into all this; are we wrong? Did he redeem himself there? Did he also by doing that book himself a one-way to the Island of Love?

-Speaking of Love: Kate - full of it? Full of love, or just "it"?

-How hilarious were the Others with their needle? "I don't know where to stick it! Oh, is that the sternum? I'm looking for his heart, right, so I'll just stick it right where my model says the stomach is. Don't crowd me! I'm performing surgery that to anyone with a brain would require open heart procedures, here! And when he wakes up he has to think we did all that through a little peephole in his chest! I'm under PRESSURE, OK!? If YOU'RE so smart, YOU rig up the Sawyer!"

-Talking of torture: For the love of Elmer Fudd, they made Jack watch DUCKS?

-I'm so tired of Charlie. "I'll fix the roof! I mean, rearrange the bamboo. It's a job I CAN DO THANK YOU, get out of here with your Scottish accent and penchant for nekkidness."

-Are Claire's roots finally showing?

-WHEN will Benry's lip cuts heal? Yeah yeah only been a week blahditty blah.

-Random new hot guy playing golf: Lot of angst there for not having really been there this whole time. Did we see YOU stepping up to run off into the jungle? NO. We KNOW you weren't written into it until this season but still. Don't complain when you didn't volunteer for the hard stuff in the first place.

-And, honestly, after all this I think we learned one big thing: BENRY is the weak link in them all. He's the lonely poor baby who never got affection from mama and now he's sad. Sad, sad, Benry. Watch me cry. But watch him be the key to the main three's escape.

Category: Episode Recaps -- posted at: 12:56 PM
Comments[10]

First, thanks for all the nice comments: If you want Andrew and John to also post theories and thoughts, bother them at andrew at staff dot mugglenet dot com or john at the-leaky-cauldron dot org.

Meanwhile!

I have two words about last night's episode:

Nekkid Desmond!

Nekkid Desmond Nekkid Desmond Nekkid Desmond Nekkid Desmond!

Tie-dye hippy-happy now-clairvoyant boy, nekkidly looking out into a clear day and seeing forever. That's right, guys, nekkid!Desmond is also I Can See Clearly Now the Hatch is Gone!Desmond, otherwise known as newly Powerful See-the-future!Desmond.

And I like it. As long as he keeps the tie-dye.

Some more thoughts:

1. Do they all have powers now? Nekkid!Clairvoyant!Desmond, TalkToTheIsland!Locke, and will it be, Kung-Fu-Fighting-With-My-Jesus-Stick!Eko? Or, perhaps Eko will have some other cool power, like being able to attract small objects to him and his barrel chest. Maybe he can start with Charlie's brain, and beat some sense into it. Seriously, Charlie, what the heck? You've been on the island two months, get over the whole Don't Tell Me What To Do wah-wah, and on to the, I'm Above Immature Displays of Insecurity Beause I'm Man Enough to Know that Survival Is Better Than Stupidity, ok? I'm done with it. Anyway, theory: the electromagnetic whosiewhatsit that caused the hatch to implode sucked them all into some alternate-universe kind of wave, like an electromagnetic wave, and now they are a bit more "one" with the Island than they were. That's why they weren't harmed; they were incorporeal at the time. If Charlie's vicinity means he was, too, then this explains his total, "Durrrrh, Claire, nothing happened in the hatch. I was high at the time," attitude.

2. Locke's flashback - I really, really, thought perhaps we'd see how Locke lost use of his legs. I do think this is post-Helen, though; didn't he say he robbed a bank? That would be post-Helen, I think. I LOVED how the whole Earth Mother lady got all Bonnie and Clyde later on. And all the pot! LOL! WHY do all the commune hippies grow weed on these things? It's so cliche; it reminds me of the VERONICA MARS episode when there was this big to do made about that "tent" and it turns out they're growing this "awesome" product and it was...POINTSETTIA PLANTS. At least they knew to throw a cliche in the dustbin where it belongs and replace it with a cash crop that would make even the non-gentiles chortle.

3. Polar bear: Could he tie in to the eskimos and hatchgloo form the end of season two? Or is it more Dharma experimentation?

4. Boone's apparently got some stylin' going on in the afterlife. Bad hair, but dude looks good.

5. The Jesus stick in its very identity makes me laugh. It needs do nothing but appear, and I laugh.

6. The two new people: Best slip-ins ever. "Hi, we'll just act like we've been here all along, because the good doctor isn't here to hotten up this place. Everyone just act normal, k? Thanks."

7. Locke: Hi everyone! I'm the new Jack! Please treat me accordingly! Thanks!

8. Desmond: I will skip rocks into the oblivion to see if I can tell where they land before they get there. A ha! Knew it'd only do three jumps!

-Melissa

Category: Episode Recaps -- posted at: 2:52 PM
Comments[17]